Who am I?

Thanks to Deepak and Oprah’s new 21 day meditation I have been asking myself this question. It was posed on Day 1 of the meditations and I have re-listened to it more than once. I don’t pretend to be an awesome meditator. My mind goes off on tangents all the time however I bring it back on each occasion and enjoy the stillness. I must admit that when the question was first posed and Deepak asked us to listen to our inner voice, the answer I got was quite surprising (to say the least). “I am a child”. I know there are many who know me that would laugh themselves silly at this revelation (particularly my children and brother) and then proceed to list all the reasons that this is true, but I believe that I need to look at this on a deeper level.

Why am I a child? Let’s see….

What attributes do I share with my grandchildren and the Tween?

I am open to new experiences. Yes, they sometimes scare me but I approach them with an open mind. I love to laugh. I am always learning. I am always growing (and no I don’t mean in size). I am always growing spiritually.  I enjoy creating – whether it is digitally, with paints, fabrics or words. I vibrate to music. I trust too much. I see the best in everyone. I don’t see differences. Okay, this is not entirely true because as an adult I have learned to discern the differences, however I choose to see the person behind the mental illness, disability, skin colour, sexual preference or other ‘imperfection’ that sets them apart from the so-called ‘norms’ of society. Like a child I see the differences but don’t see the differences (if you understand where I am going with this). So if I am a child – so be it.

The other words that came to me when I asked my inner being ‘Who am I’ were “Peace” and “Courage”.

I wish to explore those words in more depth. On the surface, I can understand the word ‘peace’. A constant thought of mine is ‘why can’t everyone just get along’? I am learning to become more peaceful and calm in my every day life. It isn’t easy believe me. Having worked to a deadline the past two days, I found myself beginning to stress the closer to the deadline I came and the more those around me (my boss in particular) began to panic. But I got through it. I am happy with the results. My boss is happy with the results and rewarded me with a beautiful floral bouquet for completing the project. Now that all of that is behind me, I am once again at peace. I try to be peaceful and calm in my dealings and in life. I have been told that I am ‘laid back’. I responded by stating that ‘lazy’ might be a more accurate description. Perhaps ‘peaceful’ is the word that I was looking for.

I need to explore Courage a little deeper. I don’t believe I am anything at all like that. To me the embodiment of courage is the soldier on the battlefield or those in the Philippines doing things tough right now. Inside me is a quivering little girl just wanting to cry and be comforted. When challenges occur in my life, I just do what has to be done and keep going. (I’ll console the quivering little girl later). This is definitely a word that I wish to explore in more depth.

In looking for a photo to go with this post, I came across a digital layout that I did in May 2006 about who I was then. Not much as changed really except that now I embrace the love of others and see it for the blessing that it is.

So who are you? Have you asked yourself this question lately? I don’t mean what you do for a living or your name and family lineage. I mean, who are you really? What makes you the unique person that you are?

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. And if you get a chance to check out the free 21 day meditations, do so. It is Day 3 now and the meditations are up for 5 days afterward so you can still catch up. The theme of the meditations are ‘Desire and Destiny’. I’d love to hear your thoughts if you join me in this.

Have a blessed day.