Expectations and Disappointments

There are many times in our lives when our expectations of people, places and things don’t measure up. Sometimes it is because we have set our standards too high I believe. However if you don’t have standards to set then you will never have a yardstick to measure anything with.
I am guilty of expecting much from myself and then becoming disappointed with the results. I do it all the time.
It isn’t really fair to myself to do this either however I continue to do it.
So what has prompted this post?
Yesterday I took my daughter to a High Tea to meet the cast of Dance Moms. Well it wasn’t all of the cast since one cast member is facing criminal charges for assault against the dance teacher (Abbey Lee) and another is touring other parts of the world with her child.
My Tween and her her tween friend were excited beyond belief to actually meet the girls, their mothers and Abbey Lee. I was a little more subdued although I do have a bit of a girly crush on a couple of the mothers who (in my eyes) don’t always buy into the bitchiness and backstabbing that make up the majority of the show’s viewing.
The Tween just wanted to see the girls dance.
She wasn’t disappointed with anything about the day.
I was. I had taken my DSLR and was hoping to take beautiful photos of the dancers spinning, jumping and being beautiful. But damn it!! I couldn’t get it right.
Shot after shot was blurred and I was growing more frustrated by the minute as I changed settings and ISO. Many looked wonderful in the LCD but didn’t fare so well on my computer screen once I had downloaded them.  I managed a couple that I have added an ‘artist’s touch’ to in order to disguise the obvious grain and motion blur. But the majority of the photos were horrid. I think what is worse is that this occasion is not something that I can go back to later and re-take the photos armed with a tripod and better knowledge.
Luckily my daughter had her iPad and shot video that she is able to take stills from. That has made her happy. Because if she had been relying on her mother, she would have been terribly disappointed in the results.

Now to the another disappointment of the day. Abbey Lee.
I have watched the show “Dance Moms” countless times. Sometimes I have watched the same episode two or three times (not my choice), so I have built up an idea of this dance teacher in my mind.
I went along to the High Tea hoping beyond all hope that the producers of the show had just put it all together in such a way as to make her look really bad. Surely nobody could be that harsh, opinionated or egotistical? Sadly, my experience was that the producers must have done very little editing.
Abbey Lee is an attractive woman. Her hair and  makeup were tastefully done and her clothing choices were also tasteful. She looked elegant and sophisticated as she addressed the audience.
She is knowledgeable about her craft and this reflected in the answers given to questions from the floor. She is articulate and well spoken. She is also incredibly harsh.
Although pre-warned by the organisers that Abbey-Lee does not like questions beginning with “ummm” I was still shocked when she refused to answer any question posed if it was preceded by ‘umm’. One young girl at the table across from us, looked about to burst into tears when she began her question with ‘umm’.  Abbey replied  “What did you say?” and then moved on without answering the girl’s question. She even pointed out that the poor girl was near tears “Look she is about to cry” followed by the words  “harden up” before moving on to the next eager questioner.
(My sympathies were beginning to lie with the former cast member who is facing assault charges for hitting this woman).
Abbey Lee did not like answering questions about the former cast member or one of the other mothers (touring overseas right now). When she did answer those questions she was harsh and bitter with her responses.
In the case of my expectations of the dance teacher, I was disappointed.

My expectations of the prices of merchandise items on sale prior to the High Tea were met. Everything was over priced as I expected.  However the Tween was free to choose to spend her saved birthday and Christmas money as she wished. And she was happy so that is all that matter.

On a brighter note. The young dancers (all Tweens) were just delightful. They danced beautifully. They smiled and posed for photos with those at the tables and they showed grace and poise beyond their years. Their mothers were also lovely. I confess, I wanted my photo (without the Tween and her friend) with the mums, and I got my wish. Sandwiched between my favourites, Holly and Jill who greeted me with “Come over here Dance Mom” before posing for the photo with genuine smiles on their faces. When I mentioned it was my birthday, they both wished me a happy birthday and gave me a hug.

Although yesterday was a day of expectations and some disappointments, it was a huge success in the eyes of the Tween and her friend and that is all that matters.
For those who may be interested, photos are following.