Changing Your Life – Week 3

I’m sorry for the break in these posts. Between the internet down and then having grandchildren over to stay, my time has not really been spent on the computer.
Remember last time I said I was going to write in my gratitude journal each night. Sadly, that lasted less than a week. *sigh*
I am the worst person at remembering things. My doctor has given up on prescribing daily stuff for me and if she does it always comes with a stern lecture. lol
I have pulled out my gratitude journal once more and this time I am placing it by my bed. It will only take a minute or two each night so I am hoping that this plan works.

So, we have reached week three in Cheryl Richardson’s book “Life Makeovers”.
In this chapter she writes about ‘Finding your lost self’. The chapter begins with an awesome quote by Reuben (Hurricane) Carter.

“When you’re in solitary confinement and you’re six feet under without light, sound or running water; there is no place to go but inside.  And when you go inside, you discover that everything that exists in the Universe is also within you”

I guess it is true that when you have nowhere else to go, the only place left to go is within.

Cheryl states in her book that in her coaching practice she comes across many people who have ‘lost’ themselves. She explains that in this day and age people are pulled in so many different directions and each direction requires us to share a part of ourselves. We give and give until we don’t know who we are any more.
Cheryl uses the analogy of a spoked wheel as a metaphor for our lives.
Each spoke represents a part of our lives in which we give of ourselves e.g. school, work, family, church, camera club, volunteering, health issues etc. (Please feel free to insert your own ideas here as my mind isn’t playing nice today and was having troubles coming up with other suggestions). At the centre of this wheel is the core (us) and the more connected we are to the core, the more our life takes on meaning and purpose. So if we wish to find ourselves and who we really are once again, we have to take steps to look within that core.

Cheryl lists 4 ways that you can do this.

1. Keep a journal

This one is right up my alley and one I agree with 100%. I wish that I was a regular journal keeper but in the past 30 years I have managed to fill more than one book with my thoughts. I may not journal every day (or even every month) but when I do take up my journal and pen, I pour myself onto the pages. I could probably say that blogging is also my way of journalling as I pour my heart into my posts of mine each day.
Cheryl describes journalling as a dialogue with yourself and I would have to agree.
When I was younger I actually named my diary. Her name was Bindi (way before Bindi Irwin I assure you) and I would talk to her about my day and my current crush and how annoyed I was with my parents etc. lol
I have always stated that writing is the cheapest form of therapy so reading this point certainly reinforces my thinking.

2. Capture your dreams

In this instance we are not talking about your hopes and dreams for the future but rather those dreams that you have when you are sleeping. Many times our dreams reveal much to us about ourselves so getting into the habit of remembering (and writing down) dreams can be very revealing.
I have very vivid dreams and some mornings I replay them over in my mind wondering what they mean. I often write these dreams down and then later look to see if I can find what the meaning behind it was. Online dream dictionaries can be helpful but sometimes it is about working out what is going on in our own lives and how the interpretation fits in with that rather than applying a ‘one size fits all’ approach.
For example, last night I dreamed that I found almost $100 in bills and coins in a handbag of mine that I had forgotten about. There are many interpretations about money out there. I read many and then analysed what I thought it meant in relation to my current circumstances. Even if you don’t use a dream meanings dictionary, try to work out exactly what your dreams were telling you about yourself. Sometimes they may just mean that something you watched on television triggered something or you really shouldn’t have had that big piece of cheese before bed.

3. Create a community of support

Don’t be afraid to share with a small and trusted group of people about your search for self. Meet up with them and chat.  As you speak with them you will learn more about who you are and what you’ve come here to do. Sometimes it takes someone on the outside looking in to open our eyes.

4. Reawaken your spiritual life

Whatever your beliefs in this life, delve into what is important to you. Read books, study teachings, write in your journal, learn and grow. If you find solace in rituals and prayers and you have strayed from these, then return to them. If sitting under a tree and closing your eyes and enjoying the blessings of nature is more in line with your beliefs then aim to do this on a regular basis. All people are spiritual in nature and reconnecting with that is what is important.

Perhaps the most important thing to do when looking for yourself is to remember that when you make a promise to spend time with yourself then you must keep that promise.
A few weeks ago, I set the goal to spend time each morning in meditation once again. after I stopped this practice with a house full of people after the passing of little Suzanne. Sadly, I have failed in this respect however I realise that breaking a promise to myself is just as bad as if I had broken a promise made to someone else.
I need to rectify this.
I used to look forward to my times of meditation. Spending time with myself was energising and wonderful so I look forward to doing this once again.

Cheryl explains that our relationship with ourselves is at the heart of a great career, loving relationships, true joy and a meaningful life so when we lose that relationship these things will suffer. In order to be happy we need to find the time to be with ourselves once more and discover just who we really are.

This week’s challenge is to get your planner for the coming year and block out time for yourself. Start small and then increase those times as each month progresses. You may start with an hour a week but find that as the months progress you spend half an hour each day.
I’m going to start with my half hour each morning in silent meditation. Maybe as the months go on, I will block out time in the evenings for this as well.

Just remember that ‘from little things, big things grow’ and we are working on growing a new and wonderful ‘us’.


10 thoughts on “Changing Your Life – Week 3

  1. I’ve almost always kept journals and, as you say, a blog is a journal of sorts. As for the dreams, I too have vivid dreams and some that come to me regularly. I’m sure the answer to their meaning is in ourselves and not the books that make generalisations. One of my most regular dreams, usually when things are looking very bad in the real world, is about finding a hidden room in a house I’m living in. Sometimes the room is lovely, sometimes it’s dirty and crumbling. I’m pretty sure that room is a part of me, hidden away, that I need to open and use. It’s about growth and development, using hidden talents or strengths.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I too have dreams about hidden rooms (or even hidden wings) in a house. Sometimes they were haunted and filled me with fear and sometimes it was a goldmine of beauty. I agree it is about growth and development and finding what it was inside me that I was scared of.


  2. I was just thinking about our ‘journey’ yesterday. I was wondering if I missed one of your posts. I’m so glad it’s been a case of just finding the time to continue. I already have six goals for the new year. I will, of course, add this one. I’m not so sure I can give a half hour every day at any time in the future but I’m going to try.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You don’t have to give half an hour. You may give one hour a week. Find what is right for you. The goal of half an hour a day is one that I set for myself. 🙂


  3. The third one is one reason why I enjoy blogging so much. We write and others chime in with their thoughts and suggestions, many times opening my eyes to things unseen. As far as analyzing dreams, I agree. But the dream I had the other night was very, very gruesome. I’m almost afraid to know what it means.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have had some very weird and gruesome dreams. I wrote them down anyway. One day I may choose to write a work of fantasy fiction and can tie my dream into it somehow! 😉


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