Why do we push?

~ suzjones

ImageOkay, I admit that there are times in life when pushing is absolutely essential. For example – giving birth. If you don’t do the hard yards, you don’t get the rewards of a beautiful baby to hold in your arms at the end of it all. There are advantages to pushing.
But when do you draw the line?
I was thinking about that this morning.
There are many sayings out there about pushing…
We push the point.
Push the boundaries.
When push comes to shove.
Push our way in or past.

Really, the whole concept of pushing is rather forceful isn’t it?
I sometimes feel that my days are all about pushing the proverbial up a hill. A complete waste of time and energy.
I think it’s about time that I just let go and let life move me in the direction it wants me to go.

I’m sure it would be much easier.

41 thoughts on “Why do we push?”

  3. I come from a family of driven people – well, at least, the last two generations. Barrister, clinical psychologist, Rhodes Scholar, internationally renowned musician … to name just four people out of the bunch! One of my friends attributes my depression and anxiety to the ‘pressure’ of my so-called high achieving family. I don’t know that she’s right: although I have achieved a fair bit in my life, I’ve gone for the less flashy things. Still, it’s an interesting notion.
    I literally don’t know how not to “push”. I know how to procrastinate, and break down, and be unable to do things, but even in the midst of all that there’s this nagging persistent feeling that I should still be “pushing”.
    Perhaps she’s right, on reflection – I was born into a family of “pushers” (not the drug kind, the kind you’re talking about!) and it has instilled in me thought patterns which are conducive to depression and anxiety. Hmmm. Must put this on the list to talk to my therapist about …

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    1. I think I drive myself to prove that I can do something. That’s probably part of the problem right now.
      You sound like you come from a very driven family. That has both blessings and curses with it.

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  4. Sometimes all of us need a little push, if we are on the way down or at a dangerous way, just to find a good way for us again.
    Other times we need no pushing, exactly like you write here.
    Thanks for sharing.
    Irene

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  6. Do Tai Chi of life. Become part of it, and thus subtly influence life with gentle force applies intuitively. An ounce of force yields a pound of influence.

    I can’t believe I wrote this sober.

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  8. The “letting go” concept reminds me of meditation and zen approaches. I think (emphasis on *think*) the idea is that we spend so much energy trying to control what happens in our worlds rather than letting go and simply being aware of what is happening. It also seems important to note that pushing can be because we’re forcing something, but it can also be pushing things away – most notably for me the difficult-to-manage feelings, whether it be grief, or anger, or sadness, or even sometimes joy. Thanks to your post, today I will work on not pushing, not resisting…just being.

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    1. Yes, you’ve opened up the concept of pushing a little further here. I believe Christians also teach the concept of ‘letting go and letting God’ however we spend so much of our time pushing things away from us. Sometimes we need those things to learn and grow e.g. the grief and sadness. Sometimes we are pushing things that we really don’t need to as well (such as a point). I am pleased my post made you think.

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      1. It’s tricky with the “letting go and letting God” concept because it’s easy for that to be interpreted as a passive approach to life. But that’s not really how I think about “letting go”. It’s more of an acceptance of what life has brought, with grace and openness. Of course that sounds fabulous but is a real bear to implement. 🙂

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        1. I don’t see it as passive, I see it as accepting things with grace with the occasional push in the direction we wish to go. And yes, you are completely correct in your assertion that it is a ‘bear’ to implement.

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  9. Sometimes the energy of the universe is telling us to rest. I ignore that A LOT and I don’t make any progress when I”m like that. We are surrounding by a culture that tells us to move quickly and to externalize progress by proving ourselves. Bah to that! Our journey is internal, at least I believe so. Just rest and BE. To live in the moment and not worry about the future is a challenge for me but I’m getting better at it. And why is it your blog always brings out the philosophical side of me! 😛

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    1. I have no idea Laura lol.
      It’s funny how it has taken me almost half a century to realise that our inner journey is by far the most important thing we need to undertake in our lives.
      I don’t want to leave this earth with regrets.

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  11. Sometimes, we just need to take a little vacation from ourselves. I could certainly use one, I’m getting rather weary of myself. Maybe a good fiction book would be fun.

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    1. Do that April. Read a book and enjoy your day.
      My problem with when I take time out for myself (such as spending a day reading) I have this inner program that tells me I am lazy and that I need to be doing something.

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  13. Sometimes it really is better to go with the flow. I’m that bull in the china shop. There are times when I have to tell myself to stop and just let things be.

    Yes, Suzanne, relax with some tea and just let things be for a while. Being a watcher can sometimes be a blast.

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